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Teacher and student jokes | Teacher Student Jokes In Urdu
Sir Aap Meray Abo Ko Nahi Jantay
Ustad Shagird say: Soch ker btao Keh ager main tumharey abo ko
500 roopay du jankeh inhain 200 ki zroorat hai
to woh mujhy kitnay ropay dain ga?
Shagird: Ek ropay bhi nahi sir…!!!
Ustad: (Ghussay main bola) Tum hissab nahi jantay?
Shagird: Sir aap meray abo ko nahi jantay.
Jissay Sunnai Na day Usay kia kehtay hai?
Ustad Shagird say: Jis aadmi ko sunai na da usko English main kia kehtay hain??
Sardar Shagird: Jo marzi keh do sir Usko konsa Sunai dey ga!!!
Wahaan To Siraf Ek Hi Loota Hai
Ustad Grammer Padha raha tha keh achanak ek ladkay ko bahir
Bhir jaatay howe Poocha kaha ja rahy ho?
Ladka bola: ” Main Toilet ko jata hun ”
Ustad Grimmer ki darustagi kay liye bolay: ” Nahi Bilkul ghalat “
OOr Grdaan shuru kar di ” Mujhy Toilet jana hai, Usay Toilet jana hai, Hamain Toilet jana hai, Hum sabko Toilet jana hai.”
Ladka ghabra ker bola: Lakin sir wahaan to siraf ek hi loota hai.
Hindu Teacher Or Muslim Bacha
Hindu Teacher: Bachoon Aap ko main nazar arahi hun?
Bachay bolay: Gee haan sir!
Hindu Teacher: Bachoon Ap ko Allah nazar araha hai?
Bachay: Nahi Sir!
Hindu Teacher: Hota to nazar aata.
Muslmaan bacha: Bachoon aap ko teacher ki Aqal nazar arahi hai?
Bachay: Nahi!
Muslmaan bacha: Hooti to nazar aati!
Kia kisi ko Asay kaam ki Saza mil sakti
Shagird: Kia kisi ko esay kaam ki saza mil sakti
hai jo isnay na kia ho?
Ustad: Nahi!
Shagird: Shukar hai,,, aaj maina ghar ka kaam nahi kia!
Mera Dada Ki Shadi hai!
School main ek bachay ko samjh nahi araha tha keh woh chutti kay liye kia Uzzar paish karay.
Baharhaal Us nay Ustad say kaha : ” Janab! Meray Dada
ki shadi hai is liye main kal naa aasako ga.”
Ustad: ” woh is umar main shadi ker rahy hain.”
Bachay na masoomiat say kaha: ” Janab! Woh to ab bhi nahi kerty yeh to main zabardasti karwa raha hun.
Pakistan Main Amman ku Nahi
Ustad: Pakistan main Amman ku nahi qaim hota hai?
Pappo: Hamara jhanda hi ulta hi.
Ustad: Kia Matlab?
Pappo: Sufaid rang amman ka hota hai oor sabaz rang
qoom ka Ammman ko to danda dia howa hai ager Yahi
Danda Qoom ko dia hota To aj mulak main amman hota.
Maina Khalis Doodh Ka Mazmoon Likha Hai!
Ustad Shagird say: Sab bachoon nay doodh per 2 safhoon ka
mazmoon likha hai,
Or tum nay Siraf 2 lines ka, ku?.
Shagird: Sir, Woh maina khalis doodh ka mzmoon likha hai!
Exams Main Ladki Na Pappo Say Bola
Exams Main ladki na pappo say bola:
Mujhay bas is javab ka pehla word bata to baki main kar lungi.
Pappu nay idhar udhar dekha oor ahista say boola:
” THE “
Ek Student Ki Nazar Main Acha Teacher Kon Hota Hai?
Ek Student ki nazar main acha teacher kon hota hai?
Esa Teacher jo haftay main3 bar chutti kary
Esa teacher jo cla*** main 10 mint lait aye oor 10 mint
pehlay cla*** khatam ker day.
Esa Teacher jo kabhi Home Work Na day.
Hazaroon Ki Qisamt Teray Paas Thi
Student: Hazaroon ki kisamt teray pas thi
Pa*** ker dete to kia baat thi.
Teacher: Ishaq Thooda kam karta to kia baat thi.
Kitabain to beta sari tera pa*** thi.
Quid e Azam 4 Saal Kay Ho Gaye Thay
Teacher: 1876 ko kia howa tha?
Pappu: Pata nahi.
Teacher: Quide Azam peda howe tha.
Teacher: 1880 ko kia howa tha?
Pappu: MashAllah Quide azam 4 saal kay ho gye tha.
Rayazi Main Koi Baat Nahi Kerta
Bacha: Sir log Urdu, English main baat kerty hain Lakin
Rayazi main koi baat nahi kerta,,,
Ustad: Ziada 3,5 na ker oor 9,2,11 ho ja warna 6 kay 36 nazar ayain g*** oor 32 kay 32 bahir jain gy.
Bacha: Nahi sir woh Urdu oor english hi theek hai.
MERA Bhai Sharafat
Teacher: Tumharey saath yeh chotta bacha kon hai?
Pappu: MERA Bhai sharafat.
Teacher: Yum isay Cla*** main kion laye hoo?
Pappu: Aap nay hi to kaha tha keh
Cla*** main sharafat kay sath betha karo.
Tum Badey Ho Ker Kia Karo Gay
Teacher: Tum badey ho ker kia karo g***?
Bacha: Nikaah,,,
Teacher: Mera matlab hai kia banoo g***?
Bacha: Dulha,,,
Teacher: Mera matlab hai baday ho ker kia hasil karo g***?
Bacha: Dulhan,,,
Teacher: Batameez baday ho ker Mammi Pappa kay liye kia karoo g***?
Bacha: Bahoo laoo ga,,,
Teacher: Bewaqoof Tumharey pappa tum say kia chahtay hain?
Bacha: Poota,,,
Teacher: Aray Kamenay teri zindagi ka kia maqsad hai?
Bacha: Shadi,,,
Kitnay Anday Bach Gaye
Teacher Bachay say: Beta Maan loo maina tumko 20 Anday Dia hain.
Bacha: Q maan lun Teacher Aap nay to Mujhay ek anda bhi nahi dia.
Teacher: Aray beta maan lo Tumhara kia jata hai.
Bacha: Theak hai.
Teacher: Haan To usmain sa 5 anday tum na mujhay wapis kar dia. tO BTAO tumharay pa*** kitnay anday bach g***e?
Bacha: 100 Anday.
Teacher: Woh kesay?
Bacha: Aap bhi maan lo naa maina bhi to aapki maani thi na?
Teacher and student jokes | Teacher Student Jokes In Urdu
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